When it doesn’t pay to be “plus” while traveling

I travel pretty frequently for business, and recently we also took a family trip. I’ve also been my heaviest weight during these last few months of travel. There are incidents that happen during my day-to-day life that remind me of my weight. For example, getting out of breath while taking the stairs, my back hurting while washing dishes or having a hard time getting off the floor. But when I started flying more frequently I was shocked at how difficult it is for a plus size person. 

I happen to have a lot of body confidence. So I typically think I look pretty great in the clothes I wear, and if something doesn’t fit, I don’t get upset and buy the next size.

When traveling, I came across these difficulties that didn’t necessarily make me “feel bad” about myself, but I was certainly frustrated at the inconveniences. I’m here to normalize them for anyone who’s feeling like crap about themselves because of it. And who knows? We may reach an airline, and make an impact.

The difficulties of flying as a plus size person:

1) Walking to a far gate

Man! Some of the gates are REALLY FAR. Can we talk about how I had to walk .68 miles at JFK to get outside the terminal? I had to strip off my jacket, and I continued to sweat. I met my move goal by 200% on those fly days, and I was FEELING IT. 

Do I need to be in better shape? Yes. But that doesn’t take away from the fact that even just getting to the gate can be a workout. After I did long gate walks a few times, I realized that I needed to be in a better mindset for the walk. Having a rolling carry on made it easier for me and taking my jacket off to begin with and wearing lightweight clothing helps too.

2) Airplane aisles

Oh boy. Let’s talk about the teeny, tiny airplane aisles for a second. I’ve perfected that little diagonal-body shuffle down the aisle so as to avoid rubbing my big booty on as few people as possible. It’s inevitable that it’s going to happen, especially when you’re turning to put your luggage in the overhead compartment. I don’t think the size of the aisle can be changed, but it sure ain’t pretty. 

3) Airplane seats in coach

I literally think the airplane seats are made for size 6 and smaller. They’ve got us squeezed together so tightly to begin with, and the fact that no matter how I position myself, my back loader is touching the person next to mine doesn’t help anyone. And the arm rests are pinching my sides as if to say “Alert! Alert! You’ve reached the limit!”.

Every single part of the seat is there to remind you that you’re too big for societal “norms”, and it’s not pleasant — mostly because it’s physically just really uncomfortable. 

In fact I was so uncomfortable in coach, that I started flying first class. Yes, I pay exorbitant amounts of money to fly with the rich and famous simply because I am more comfortable in the seats up there. I know that not everyone can afford to do this, but there really is a huge (pun intended) difference in the seat width.

4) The dreaded airline seatbelt

This is my absolute biggest gripe with the airlines. Because it cannot be that hard to make a seat belt that fits people size 16+. Why should we have to go through the “shame” in asking the flight attendant for a seat belt extender?

I remember the first time I had to ask. It was recently, and I was MORTIFIED. I think the flight attendants are trained to be super sly about it so it felt like I was doing a bit of a drug deal. But I really couldn’t believe I actually needed one. 

And if I needed one, I couldn’t imagine how many other people needed one too. I’m not morbidly obese by any stretch. I’m a solid size 18. My heart really goes out to everyone who feels that shame and embarrassment every time they fly. It’s a hard place to be in.

I actually bought my own seatbelt extender on Amazon. It fits all airlines except Southwest. I felt like I was more in control that way. As for first class, sometimes I need the extender and sometimes I don’t. It all depends on what model and airline the airplane is. I’ve found that Delta runs the smallest out of all airlines, and I never got lucky to get an updated plane. So that kind of sucked.

5) The dang airline bathrooms

Wow they’re really tiny. They’ve always been tiny, but they got even smaller as I got bigger. No suggestions, but instead, solidarity. Your butt will inevitably touch every single surface of that bathroom, and you might come out sweating. You are a warrior, and we’re in this together.

I’m sure some of you will read this, and say “it’s your fault that you’re so FAT” and “why don’t you just lose some weight, ya whale?”, and I’m also sure those of you saying that are not plus size yourself and may be a bit of a Karen in general. I talk about the concept of health vs. plus size often. There is a huge difference. Someone can be plus size and be perfectly healthy. Or the opposite. Exactly as a skinny person can be unhealthy as well. 

I’m a proud, plus size woman who is happy with the way I look, and I’m proud of my body and everything it’s been through. And as I try to make the world a more normalized and plus-friendly place, I’m also here to say that the airline industry does not make it easy to travel at every size. And I think that needs to change. A woman shouldn’t have to have a panic attack trying to buckle her seatbelt because she’s mortified to ask for an extender. 

If you’re plus size and nodding along as you read this, I hope you know that, while airlines make us feel “not normal”, really everything you feel is. Don’t be ashamed of your body simply because you don’t “fit”. It’s not just you, and I’m calling for a change. One day, I hope we all truly feel “welcomed aboard” as we fly into a new era that is truly accommodating to everyone.